Help the aged . . . .

I'm losing control here.....

Feeling a little old here.
It's not the disappearing hair or the failing eyesight.
It's not even the fast-diminishing ear function (something that I suspect I've caught from The B).
It's more that, more than ever, I'm finding myself unable to keep up with The B&G, their development too rapid for me, he-who-can-be-easily-outwitted, or as The B likes to call me, Slow Coach.
Things that have made me feel ancient in recent days:
1) The other day, en route to collect The B from nursery, me and The G.
The G decided to travel sans buggy, preferring to go on foot.
This in mind, I thought it best to depart a little earlier than normal, thinking that our progress might be a touch slower due to The G's little legs.
Not so.
In fact, I found it difficult to keep up, The G setting off at an impressive pace that forced me to trot along behind like the small child in the partnership.
2) I'm no longer needed to operate the remote control for the TV.
This used to rank high on the list of my most-important SAHD duties, but it seems such services are surplus to requirements these days.
You see, The B&G have both figured it out.
The B can turn on the TV, pull up the menu and select a programme for his viewing pleasure, be it Octonauts, Fireman Sam or Mike the Knight.
The G hasn't mastered all the functions as yet, but if The B finds Peppa Pig for her, she is quite adept at scrolling through and choosing her favourite episodes.
Yesterday, I turned on the TV and asked them what they'd like to watch.
"Just leave the remote, Daddy," came the response.
3) The B has discovered word processing.
I find it difficult to use the laptop these days because The B is always on it, doing, as he calls it, his 'work'.
In the main, this involves opening up the word processing programme, and using the keyboard to make words.
Some are real words, albeit variations on 'poo'.
The other day, though, he held down the S key for several seconds, calling me over to admire the subsequent ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss on the screen.
"That's what a snake says, Daddy," he told me.
Genius.
4) I'm suffering from a cold.
I know, it's just a cold, but still, it's quite a bad one, the kind I like to call flu, a habit that is guaranteed to make The W sigh and shake her head.
Yesterday, I came downstairs and, as I like to do, began to complain about said illness.
The B came over and cast me a sympathetic look.
"You just need a good sleep," he said. "That'll do you good."
Like I said earlier, feeling a little old here.